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Turkmenistan

02 Sunday Jan 2022

Posted by Ed Mahoney in covid-noir

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

conspiracy theory, Don'tLookUp, happy new years

Gates of Hell

I’m triple vaxxed.  I don’t care about your politics, this is not a political statement.  I’m just saying.  I also received the flu shot along with two shots for Shingles because I’m in that demographic.  Regardless, on New Year’s Eve, I came down with a cold.  Insert your favorite profanity <here>.  At least the home test says I’m negative on Covid, I’ll test for reals tomorrow at a drive-through.

So, this is how I’ll start 2022.  Could be worse.  My first home in Boulder County was near ground zero of the recent fire that destroyed 1000 homes.  Looks like my block was spared although I have yet to perform a drive-by.  But that has me thinking about just how worse things could get in 2022.  Bad times have been trending for a couple of years now and I’ve yet to see anything to suggest a reversal of fortune.

Like anyone else stuck in the house to avoid exposing others to my malady, I’ve dedicated my morning to the keyboard, tapping out queries to explore just how bad things could get in 2022.  Turns out, things can get plenty bad.  Until you’re dead, things can always get worse.

I started by reviewing all the Covid stats published by seemingly bonafide health organizations.  No surprise, the stats are trending in a bad direction.  But everyone knows this.  I wanted to know what everyone doesn’t know.  I wanted to find the next shoe to drop.  So, I targetted my browser at the deep web.  If you’re not familiar with that iceberg metaphor, the known web sites, those indexed by Google, etc., constitute just the tip of the iceberg.  Most web sites are unsearchable and hence, underwater – the deep web.  This is where I searched for our pending doom and this is what I discovered.

You’ll find this hard to collaborate because Turkmenistan doesn’t publish their Covid stats.  Leveraging my several decades of IT and cybersecurity skills, I discovered cases around the city of Ashgabat where people who’ve tested positive three times, and who have subsequently died after their third infection, have come back to life.  Sort of.  They’re not really alive, they’re dead, but they’re zombies.  The living dead.

I don’t want to cause a panic. If you’re wondering why I suspected Turkmenistan, it’s because that country is home to the Gates of Hell, so it was a logical first place to search for zombies.  I know that without an extensive background in researching these kinds of things online like I have, you won’t be able to confirm any of what I’ve shared here.  I’m sure that frustrates you.  If you have friends though who are in IT, especially cybersecurity, and they have these skills, ask them to start looking into this for you.  If 2022 does bring about a zombie apocalypse, you’re going to want to be prepared.

Be safe.

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